These are actual events.....

10/25/2001 - I was having a dream. In the dream I was sleeping and could feel someone on top of me. It was one of those dreams where you're trying to talk and no sound comes out of your mouth, you're trying to move and you can't. In the dream it was my boyfriend on top of me and I was trying to say "get off of me" and trying to shake him off but of course I couldn't move. So the dream woke me up and I tossed and turned for a few minutes trying to get back to sleep.

Then I heard a noise outside like the wind picking up and I thought, oh, good, it's finally going to rain. Only the wind never blew my curtains up and then I thought maybe the noise I heard was a car, but no car ever drove by. And the noise continued and I thought, that's weird, there's something or someone outside. It sounded like it was outside my bedroomn window facing the street, then the sound was outside the window facing the neighbor's yard. And I had my head up and was looking from window to window like what the heck?

I put my head down thinking I was just hearing things and then it felt like something was trying to get in my room and I started to get really spooked, but what am I going to do? Open my bedroom door and walk out into a dark house or go wake my son up, like he could help?

Then the next thing I knew there was an energy or presence swirling over me as I lay in bed and I put my head up again and couldn't understand why the covers weren't being blown around. It kept swirling and twirling around over me for a few seconds and then all of a sudden it stopped. I looked around my room and thought to myself, wait, I'm awake, I don't do drugs, I haven't had a drink in ages. I was definitely awake the entire time. I just kept looking around my roon at the shadows, not seeing anything, thinking that was one of the spookiest things that ever happened to me.

Finally I was able to get back to sleep.

Happy Halloween!

So Here I Sit.....

....waiting for the cable guy to show up with my digital box.

I was reading some blogs by people in Southern California who are writing about the fires. How scary. I don't even want to think about what hell some of these people are going through.

And it's raining on Kauai today. It's been raining off and on since Sunday afternoon. If there were only some way to send some of the rain to them. Can you imagine surviving the fire with only the clothes on your back?

I wonder how many insurance companies are in a panic right now.

Who Wants My Money?

I decided to purchase a telephone from my phone company.

So I called them last week. The phones were out of stock and they told me to call back on Monday cuz that's when a shipment comes in. I asked why they couldn't take my order and ship me the phone when it arrives? Because they don't know what's in the shipment.

Huh?

Most companies will take your order and ship you the item when it's in stock. Because they usually know what's in the shipment and when it's coming in. But not the phone company.

Do they not want my money?

I did see a phone I want at KMart but they are not offering a payment plan like the phone company. So I could have spent my money at KMart if I wanted to fork over the money all at one time.

Is my phone company just too big to care about customer service?

I would switch phone companies but they're the only ones that offer land lines in this state. Maybe that's why they don't really care whether I spend the money with them or somewhere else.

All I know is that if I was in business and someone called me with an order I'd take it. If the item was out of stock I would let them know when it was due to arrive. And I would keep them updated about it's arrival. And when it arrived I would let them know when it shipped to them. In other words, I would service my customers.

But I guess the phone company isn't all that interested in servicing their customers.

The cable company isn't that much better. I also called them because I hadn't heard about my digital box yet. Turns out the boxes had arrived but they hadn't gotten around to calling everyone yet. So I scheduled an appointment this week to have my digital box installed.

It's getting scary. Pretty soon there will one company that owns everything and we'll all be such little specks of dust to them they won't even care...............

Finally It's Friday.......

Actually this week went by pretty fast. At one of my jobs my boss has been on another island all week so I got to goof off a little..........

The weather this week has been so nice. The mornings have been cool and clear and the days not too hot. I saw an unreal sunset driving home from Lihue last night after shopping at WalMart. There were wispy clouds in the sky and as the sun was setting they turned orange and pink. I haven't seen such a beautiful sunset in quite a while. Wish I had my camera with me.

Tonight I should have worked out but took a shower and drank a Heineken. Now I feel pretty relaxed and ready for a nap. The plan is to work out tomorrow morning before I shower and eat. Then run an errand or two and head for the beach.

Nighty Night...

The Scoop On Saturday.......

I was up at 5 AM and in the shower. My son had bowling for Special Olympics and we had to be there at 7:45 AM. On a Saturday. Groan..............but he has so much fun. He placed first in the group he was in. After bowling we were stuck in the parking lot because of a parade going up the street. So we watched the tail end of the Aloha Week Parade. It was actually a nice parade. The pa'u riders looked beautiful with their leis on. And the horses had leis too. And not just around their necks but also on the top of their heads and on the backs of their saddles.

So when we could get out of the parking lot we headed home, got ready and headed for the beach. It was beautiful as usual and the water felt great. We played ball in the water and just layed around on the sand in the sun. While we were at the beach, the ex-boyfriend called me. He was at Pine Trees (a surf spot) in Hanalei but the surf was so big no one was out. He said that he was probably going to come over later. We headed home, got showered and went to bed kind of early cuz we were up so early. The ex-boyfriend never showed up.

Sunday's Happenings.........

Up early again Sunday morning as my son had non-competitive bowling. Each team consisted of two athletes, and two coaches and/or volunteers. It was more for fun than anything else and everyone had a good time. Afterwards we headed home to get ready for the beach again.

Just as we were heading out the door the phone rang and it was the ex-boyfriend. He was down in Kapaa and said to wait for him and he'd go to the beach with us. When he got here we loaded up his truck with beach stuff and headed out. We got gas and made a couple of stops for food (McDonald's and Subway). It was another beautiful day and we stayed at the beach for a couple of hours then headed home. My son and I took showers while the ex headed out to check the surf at Kealia. When he got back we watched some tv.

Confession Time......

TIme to fess up............I had sex with the ex.

The whole time we were "doing it" I was wishing he was the heartbreaker. And wondering what making love with him would be like.

I'm not in love with the ex anymore but there is something to be said about familiar sex. We always were very compatible in bed and sex was always good.

So, now I've had sex twice this year. Both times with the ex.

But, then he kind of surprised me. He wanted to go play some pool and come back later. Like midnight. Sorry, I told him, I would be sleeping. So he said he was going to get something to eat and would be back. I told him to just go. Which he did.

Word of advice.........

Hey men, listen up here..............

After sex it's not a good idea to dig out.

NOT. A. GOOD. IDEA.

You should at least spend some time with the woman so she doesn't feel used.

I'm not mad or upset with him but I do feel a little hurt and used.

Good thing I'm not mad or I'd probably be leaving nasty messages on his voice mail.

So anyway, that's my weekend.

Heartbreaker Sighting

I can't believe what happened this afternoon.

I had just gotten gas and was driving through the parking lot when I spotted a familiar face driving a familiar truck going in the opposite direction. I decided immediately not to check my mail and cut between the parked cars with the intention of checking him out. He had just parked the truck and was getting out when I pulled up, put my window down and said hi. He said hi and stuck his hand out which I shook. We chatted briefly. Cars were beginning to pile up behind me so I said to him "You should call me". He said "I will". We said goodbye and then I drove away.

I can't believe he's back......he has the cutest dimples. He hadn't shaved in several days and looked like he just got off work. He is so cute. I just melt thinking about him. He wasn't driving his truck but the truck of one of the guys he works with. I've seen this truck several times in the last few months but didn't recognize who was driving it - it wasn't the heartbreaker.

I can only hope he calls. But if he doesn't I'll just have to deal with it............

What Possessed Me?

Yesterday after work we went to Safeway and got groceries. When we got home I vacuumed the house, cleaned the kitchen floor with a sponge (on my hands and knees), sorted the laundry, cleaned out the litter box, took the trash out, washed the dishes and put clean sheets on my bed.

What the f? Where did all that energy come from? This is so unlike me. For me to actually be in the mood to clean is like hell freezing over. Unbelieveable.....

Today after work we did laundry. At the laundromat.

My life is consumed by chores............

Not A Holiday For Me...

The banks may be closed and the post office won't be delivering mail but it's not a holiday for me. Retail stores rarely close on holidays. And even though I'm not in sales and work in the office I won't be off today. And thank goodness, I don't make enough $ to even think about taking a day off.

And school is back in session today. After a two-week break my son is really bummed about having to go back to school. Hawaii public schools gave up Columbus Day so they could have Martin Luther King Day in January off.

So, I'm off to work shortly.......

I Want To Kiss The Person Who Invented The Remote Control......

I have three standing fans in my house. And I operate all of them with remotes. I have a remote for the stereo system in the living room. And the tv, vcr and cable box are all controlled with one remote. All I can say is THANK YOU to the person(s) who invented the remote control.

On the other hand, perhaps the remote has contributed to the widening of the American waist (and hips and thighs).

But the reason I love the remote control more than anything is because everytime something about Kobe Bryant comes on the tv I immediately switch the channel. I really don't care about Kobe Bryant or his current legal situation. As far as I'm concerned they can send him to jail already. I just don't care. And I don't want to hear about any other overpaid athlete's problems either. Who cares? I have my own problems to worry about. I don't know why the media thinks we are interested in their legal problems anyway. Actually I think the media cares more about them than the American public does. So get a clue media - cover something really newsworthy.

After yesterday's gray dismal wet weather I had doubts that today would be any different. But I was wrong. It was a beautiful day and after we finished errands this morning we headed to the beach. It felt so good to get in the ocean. There's just something theraupetic about swimming.

A few days ago I made a Pineapple Upside Down cake. I've never made one before. It's quite tasty and seems to get better with age. I hear it calling me now......

It's been awhile since I posted here. I've actually been watching tv instead of spending so much time on the computer. There are a few shows that I think I like so I've got to remember when they are on so I don't miss them. I kinda like the new Whoopie show and I've been watching CSI, ER, Boomtown, Law & Order CI and a couple others I can't remember.

Today is gloomy and overcast, definitely not a beach day. I've been laying around the house doing nothing. Haven't even set foot outside today.

Last weekend we drove to Salt Pond hoping it was sunny there but it was gray and rainy. So we headed back to Kapaa and as I was driving a thought about animal rescue popped into my head. I wondered where that came from. We ended up at Baby Beach where it was sunny. As I was applying sunscreen to my son I looked over towards the water and there was a big gray bird with a pointed beak and webbed feet on the sand. He was absolutely beautiful and seemed completely out of place. He was about the size of a Nene. A few minutes later he was about 5 feet in front on us and perched on a tree branch sticking out of the sand. A man w/ three kids with him came along and showed us a 1928 Liberty quarter he just found on the beach. I asked him if he knew what kind of bird it was. Said he had no idea and had only been here a few days. His kids were throwing things at the bird and I told them to stop. He asked if there was a shelter or something like that here and I told him there was a vet in Kapaa. Over the course of the next 2 hours the bird had moved farther down the beach. Then the Humane Society truck pulled up and a guy got out and caught the bird and put it in a dog cage in the back of the truck. I went over and asked him what kind of bird it was. He said an Australian Seabird and that it is an endangered species and lives at the Hanalei Wildlife Refuge. He said he was helping out the refuge and would take the bird to the shelter and it would be given food & water until someone from the refuge could pick it up on Monday. I was glad to see the bird rescued. I've been searching the internet trying to find out what kind of bird it is. I really don't think it is a seabird because it had webbed feet like a duck or goose. And it was about the same size as a big duck. Wish I could find out what it is. Next time I drive to Hanalei I'm going to stop at the lookout and see if the bird is pictured on the signs overlooking the refuge.

Work wasn't too bad this week. The boss that was out of town last week is back this week (bummer). Twice on Thursday she farted in the office, once when I was downwind of the fan. PU - she is so gross. I seriously have to think about replacing that job. She just grosses me out.

I have not seen a good looking man on this island since the "heartbreaker" left. I keep checking out guys and it's such a bummer that there isn't anyone I'm attracted to. I'm so picky when it comes to men and I'm just not attracted to that many men. I've been thinking about the "heartbreaker" constantly, wondering where he is now, what he's working on....... I really miss seeing him around. I wish I had never let him leave my house that night..........but it's history now. I really need a man in my life..............

I hope the weather improves tomorrow. I'd really like to get to the beach.

Feeling Human Again.....

Today I am finally feeling like a human being again. Tuesday and Wednesday were both bad days - my sinuses were all stuffed up, I was feverish, body aches - yuck. I haven't worked out since Saturday and I'm feeling guilty about it.

One of my bosses is out of town this week. We work out of the spare bedroom at her house and it's so nice when she's not there. She's constantly interrupting my train of thought as we sit about 3 feet apart. She's a verbal person and I'm a written person. So whenever she wants to send a fax or an email she interrupts me. And she's constantly talking on the phone which is very disruptive. Plus, she has really gross habits. She usually is in her pajamas until lunchtime, hasn't brushed her teeth or combed her hair. It's pretty disgusting. Then she'll use the bathroom, not spray any air freshener and asphixiate me to death. Talk about stink. I actually brought a container of air freshener over and left it in her bathroom hoping she would get the hint. She hasn't yet. The only reason I've stayed working for her is because the hours are convenient, she's close to my son's school and jobs are hard to come by.

Gotta head for the shower, Survivor comes on soon.